While I always have good intentions about being better with the blog it just doesn't seem to happen...
We are adjusting and settling in as a family of 7. Never thought I'd say that. I was NOT this person that grew up wanting my own soccer team. Don't get me wrong, I always liked kids, worked as a babysitter, camp counselor or teacher and always pictured having them - I just pictured having 2. You know there were 2 kids in my family, 2 kids in my hubby's family and it just seemed, oh, I don't know - normal.
Summer is fun - its nice not to have structure - but then again, I miss the structure and so do the kids. We try to have some structure, but its not quite the same as the routine of the fall and so while we are enjoying the laid back days in the sunshine, we all look forward to fall.
Little Lulu - is in her terrible threes. I know the saying is two but all my kids have been far more terrible at 3. Good thing she's got to be about the cutest thing to ever walk the earth! We are surviving shouts of "That's MINE!" and "I do it MYSELF!". Ah, the toddler/preschool days of expressing independence. Still, surely she will be my last baby and I'm enjoying watching her grow and learn.
Speaking of independence, we're getting that almost teen independence some with the other female bookend. I have to admit that while I hate the 'tude that often accompanies this, getting that typical pre-teen 'tude means a few things for which I am thankful. It means we're comfortable enough to express a less than happy opinion AND it means we understand enough English to be put out. And really, truth be told, I can't complain... I'm sure we've got a lot worse in store as the teen years continue on. After all, I've always said there is nothing in this world like an 8th grade girl.
The boys continue to be the best of friends except when they are brothers - after all a favorite summer pastime of mine was the game "getting a rise out of my sister". Trevor is somehow managing to still fill the rule of boss-man while also learning the great art of annoying his big sister. He's been to drawing camp where he had a blast. He's been making great strides this summer in adapting and moving forward despite his Sensory Processing Disorder. BJ is loving the care-free days of summer since he is, after all, the most care-free in nature. He's one that I think would love summer to last all year and still would not get bored. He's actually maturing and doing something that all little boys fear - thinking about what he does before he does it. Not always, just once in awhile but we'll take what we can get! Easton is tan and ready for more structure. After being the only one forced to endure part-time kindergarten he is itching for the start of full-time school for more reasons than one. Still, lazy days of Lego's and playing with the boys of the neighborhood are a good distraction while he waits.
Me - I'm learning to take breaks - however small.... its a start...
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Thursday, July 1, 2010
My daughter: A picture of amazing, inspiring courage and grace
Really, I can't complain. My newest daughter has amazing courage and a fabulous attitude. Oh sure, there are challenges for us all, but her graciousness and kind and helpful spirit are definitely making even those easier. I remember the extremely difficult time I had moving, WITH MY FAMILY, from the Midwest to the east coast, and I am amazed by her.
Growing from 4-5 has not been very noticeable. The dishwasher needs to be run more frequently, and 5 kids sharing a bathroom (one being a pre-teen girl!) is going to take a few more creative solutions to make it work better, but all in all not near as drastic as doubling 1-2 or 2-4 as in the past.
I'm learning that while silence is golden it can also be challenging. Being older than Behailu, its taking Ayelech longer to pick up on language as well as to gain the confidence of using it. I suspect behind her quiet demeanor lies your average giggly pre-teen girl - that she isn't necessarily quiet by nature but rather by circumstance. Its sometimes tough to live in the silence, and hard to know how much is boredom, grief, fear and plain old pre-teen behavior.
I feel like the bond is growing. Her smile and laughter are amazing gifts. I enjoy the time we spend together and feel like we are relationship in progress.
We've had only one battle of wills so far, though I know others are surely coming - after all, she will turn 13 next year. It is my quote that there is nothing, no nothing on this planet like an 8th grade girl! And that battle, while worth fighting, I can't say I blame her for. With the language barrier she probably thinks I'm absolutely insane. You know you have to have THOSE tests done - after all Behailu has more parasites than the health dept could name when he came home. Those of you who have struggled with them understand the necessity of scooping the poop. However, can you imagine what she writes in her letters about her life in America and her new mom? "This crazy lady wants to collect my poop in little jars!". She's been such a trooper about trying all these new things but this was asking way too much.
Challenges will continue. I'm thankful for the summer that gives us a break to just be - we are working some on language etc but its good to spend lots of time as a family unit. I know that as language increases, bonds and she begins to feel more comfortable, we'll have more challenges and learn more about her tough story. I know that we have to go through that to get to healing.
Right now, at age twelve, my daughter wants to become a Dr. and return to Ethiopia. Some may see that as a heartbreaking sign against seeing this as a home. I don't. I see it as amazing. When she told me that at age 18 she wants to visit Ethiopia, I told her this from the bottom of my heart: "We will 'visit' Ethiopia long even before you are 18. We will go and experience it together. And after you finish High School and College ... if you decide to study to be a Dr. and want to go back to Ethiopia, I will gladly help you - I will connect you with my Ethiopian Dr friend and help you find a job --- I will support you and be proud of you as you become the amazing woman God has planned for you. When you are grown, if your dreams take you far away from me, to Ethiopia, I will be sad but proud of all you are doing. And wherever those dreams may take you -no matter how far or near, you will always have a place here, with us. because you are our daughter, and we love you."
To be continued...
Growing from 4-5 has not been very noticeable. The dishwasher needs to be run more frequently, and 5 kids sharing a bathroom (one being a pre-teen girl!) is going to take a few more creative solutions to make it work better, but all in all not near as drastic as doubling 1-2 or 2-4 as in the past.
I'm learning that while silence is golden it can also be challenging. Being older than Behailu, its taking Ayelech longer to pick up on language as well as to gain the confidence of using it. I suspect behind her quiet demeanor lies your average giggly pre-teen girl - that she isn't necessarily quiet by nature but rather by circumstance. Its sometimes tough to live in the silence, and hard to know how much is boredom, grief, fear and plain old pre-teen behavior.
I feel like the bond is growing. Her smile and laughter are amazing gifts. I enjoy the time we spend together and feel like we are relationship in progress.
We've had only one battle of wills so far, though I know others are surely coming - after all, she will turn 13 next year. It is my quote that there is nothing, no nothing on this planet like an 8th grade girl! And that battle, while worth fighting, I can't say I blame her for. With the language barrier she probably thinks I'm absolutely insane. You know you have to have THOSE tests done - after all Behailu has more parasites than the health dept could name when he came home. Those of you who have struggled with them understand the necessity of scooping the poop. However, can you imagine what she writes in her letters about her life in America and her new mom? "This crazy lady wants to collect my poop in little jars!". She's been such a trooper about trying all these new things but this was asking way too much.
Challenges will continue. I'm thankful for the summer that gives us a break to just be - we are working some on language etc but its good to spend lots of time as a family unit. I know that as language increases, bonds and she begins to feel more comfortable, we'll have more challenges and learn more about her tough story. I know that we have to go through that to get to healing.
Right now, at age twelve, my daughter wants to become a Dr. and return to Ethiopia. Some may see that as a heartbreaking sign against seeing this as a home. I don't. I see it as amazing. When she told me that at age 18 she wants to visit Ethiopia, I told her this from the bottom of my heart: "We will 'visit' Ethiopia long even before you are 18. We will go and experience it together. And after you finish High School and College ... if you decide to study to be a Dr. and want to go back to Ethiopia, I will gladly help you - I will connect you with my Ethiopian Dr friend and help you find a job --- I will support you and be proud of you as you become the amazing woman God has planned for you. When you are grown, if your dreams take you far away from me, to Ethiopia, I will be sad but proud of all you are doing. And wherever those dreams may take you -no matter how far or near, you will always have a place here, with us. because you are our daughter, and we love you."
To be continued...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
